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Written by: Nyx Ember

Previously Finding Joy

Nyx Ember

I started this series in 2023. And at that time I thought I knew what joy was and that moments of joy were all I wanted.  I was really still learning. My journey was in its infancy.  When I wrote my original article, I was less than a year out of an abusive relationship and I had never in my life been able to do anything I truly wanted to do.  I was not completely cognizant of what I wanted or who I was.  I have come to the conclusion that joy is actually a continuous journey instead a destination. The definition of joy is "a feeling of great pleasure and happiness." What I was really seeking was a peaceful and joyful life. Having lived in so much pain and chaos, even a moment of joy was a relief. We all experience moments of joy but a joyful life is somehow a bit more complicated as it requires you to be intentional. I have found that seeking the wisdom of my elders has taught me some absolutely invaluable lessons in this journey. They have  invested in me  something so priceless: their words, memories and LOVE. I have spent as much time as I could sitting in the presence of some of the wisest and bravest women I could find. Women who have done amazing things often during a time when they faced challenges we struggle to understand today.  Things they bring up in passing that  cause you to do a double take as you ask them to repeat what they said for a story.  And they always have a story, a rich thread woven through time.  These stories are all lessons.

Read more: Living a Joyful Life part 1 redux

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Written by: Karen Kortsch

Listening to the draft submissions of some of our other members, I found that all of the stories shared resonated with me. In the last 4 years, I have experienced retirement, the death of my mother and the death of a brother-in-law who was the same age as I am. My husband and I acted as caregiver and companion to his brother during his almost 2 year cancer journey that ended with his death in July. All of these events have changed the way I look at life and made me more determined to live an authentic life.

I retired at the age of 56 because I was financially able to do so and I felt like my work as a behavioral health nurse was not serving my patients or myself well anymore. I had a lot of moral distress about many aspects of my job and did not look forward to going to work. I definitely did not feel like I could be my authentic self on the job. Four years later I have no regrets and feel privileged to have the time to be a support person to family and friends who have to navigate our unnecessarily complicated health care system. I also am conscious of the need for self care and do not feel guilty in the least that I have the time for rest, recreation and fun. Life is good and spending time with all the wonderful women of UUWC is priceless. Thank you all for your friendship and love.

Karen Kortsch
August, 2023

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Written by: Tracy Jayne McCaffrey

At the age of 63, after working for the Illinois Department of Revenue for 23 years 3 months, I retired. Sitting here some 5 months later, I find myself hoping I don’t end up with the biggest case of buyer’s remorse. I mean, ultimately, life comes down to trading your very existence for the ability to continue to exist. In this case I traded a all those years at IDOR for the pension, and some other benefits, I now receive. But is that going to be enough? Did I make a colossal mistake? How much time do I really have left?

We encounter many milestones throughout our lives; many of which we look forward to with eager anticipation. But retirement carries with it a sense of being one of the last milestones you get to experience while still alive. I definitely looked forward to it while I was still working! And yet, the last few months haven’t exactly been a nonstop celebration. Christmas morning with pretty presents under the tree it’s not. It could, of course, be a whole lot worse. I mean, I could still be working at the Department of Revenue!